Spotlight on speeches
Practice makes perfect… and other tips on how to deliver great wedding speeches
Father-of-the-bride
- Welcomes the guests and thanks them for coming to your wedding.
- Shares some brief memories and heartfelt stories about you.
- Talks about his new son-in-law (with some gentle teasing) and formally welcomes his family into yours.
- Proposes the first toast to the bride and groom.
The groom
It’s traditional for the groom to speak after the bride’s father, but these days the best man tends to deliver his speech first so that the groom has the final say. If your groom is a nervous speaker, allow him to address the reception first.
- Thanks your father for his kind words and toast.
- Thanks your family for its financial contributions and support during the wedding preparations, adding a few comments on how beautiful the wedding décor is and thaning you, your mum and your extended team for their hard work.
- Thanks everyone for coming to the wedding, mentioning those guests who have travelled far or made a big effort to be there with you (such as your 90-year-old grandmother).
- Thanks his parents and family for their ongoing love and support.
- Thanks the groomsmen and his best man, mentioning one or two humorous stories.
- Thanks the maid of honour and bridesmaids and proposes a toast them.
- Expresses how beautiful you look and how much he loves you and can’t wait to spend therest of his life with you. Most modern grooms end their speech with a toast to their bride.
The bride
These days it’s not unusual for the bride to say a few words of thanks after the groom. Just beware you don’t steal the limelight from your husband by launching into a 30-minute PowerPoint presentation on your relationship, and don’t go on and on about how much you love your parents and your bridesmaids. You may ask your maid of honour to speak on your behalf, but again keep it brief and avoid the endless tributes.
The best man
This is the speech everyone looks forward to the most because it depicts a mischievous character sketch of the groom and has an air of fun to it. It needs to be eloquent and brief but there is underlying pressure on the best man to “perform”, to make your guests laugh… and cry… and want to hear more.
- Thanks the groom for his toast (if he’s speaking after him).
- Thanks the bride’s parents for hosting the reception.
- Thanks the bridesmaids.
- Tells a few humorous stories about the groom (without mentioning former girlfriends or the wild bachelor party).
- Talks briefly about the bride and what a lovely couple the newlyweds are.
- Reads messages from absent friends and toasts them (this can also be done by the master of ceremonies).
- Toasts the happy couple.
Master of ceremonies
The MC plays a pivotal role by ensuring the smooth running of the reception and while he/she isn’t expected to make a speech, a few funny one-liners are always good ice breakers.
- Introduces him/herself and welcomes the guests to the reception.
- Announces the entrance of the bride and groom.
- Announces how the meal will be served, any particulars of the venue and when the speeches will be delivered.
- Introduces each speaker and tells a short story about them.
- Announces the cutting of the cake, the first dance, throwing of the bouquet and garter and when you leave the reception.
Quick tips: How to get it right
- Keep wedding speeches brief: 10 – 15 minutes is enough.
- Make a list of all the thanks and pass it on to the groom and best man to ensure no one is left out.
- Practice, practice, practice; never, ever try to wing it on the day.
- Go for tongue-in-cheek, rather than foot-in-mouth.
- Stay sober.
- Start with a confident, clear voice and memorise the first sentence (“It’s an honour to be standing here tonight…”)
- Use notes or cue cards but avoid reading the speech word for word.
- Don’t try to be funny: be sincere and talk from the heart.
- Use a podium – not only is it easier to refer to the cue cards, but is steadies the nerves.
- Ask the MC to check the audio equipment before the speeches and use a microphone on an adjustable stand
This feature is taken out of Wedding Inspirations magazine Autumn 2012